what’s under his clothes?

Is your man marriage material, or is he a dating dud? We strip down The Mama’s Boy, The Peter Pan, The Fraternity Brother, and more.

Dear Toni,

Help! I keep falling for the same guy over and over again. Whether we meet at church or at a bar, I seem to be a magnet for the commitment-phobic. Long story short, they come on strong in the beginning, and then a month later they “want their space”. I’m not a girl who believes in changing a man, nor do I want to. How can I weed out the lost causes and find the real deal?
RS

RS,
Don’t be so hard on yourself! We’re all guilty of falling for a line (or a tall, buff babe), but that doesn’t mean you’re doomed to a string of one-month wonders.

If you’re seeking a tell, in poker terms, to give you clues as to a potential mate’s true nature, let his fashion be your guide. In other words, I suggest you look to a man’s clothes to show you what’s going on underneath them.

Below, I’ve categorized Dallas men by ten fashion trends and types. From The Mama’s Boy to The Poet to The Career Bachelor, his wardrobe speaks volumes before he even utters a word.

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1. The Man-Child

Pro: This guy’s not afraid to have fun and take risks while he strives to become the man he wants to be.
Con: He’s fun for right now, but his childish antics may eventually take their toll.
Advice: You might want to wait until his lower half catches up.

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2. The Mama’s Boy

Pro: This family man is genuine, and isn’t wrapped up in material things.
Con: Expect to take over all of his mother’s duties, starting with choosing his clothes.
Advice: Make sure you get along with his Mom. Otherwise, you’re relationship is doomed.

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3. The Good Ol’ Boy

Pro: This deep-rooted Texan isn’t afraid to get down and dirty to get what he wants.
Con: His idea of an exotic vacation is a trip to Paris – Paris, Texas.
Advice: If you’re an outdoorsy gal who prefers a steak and potato dinner, then this could be the guy for you.

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4. The Peter Pan

Pro: He enjoys all the things that you do, such as yoga, shopping, and pedicures.
Con: He’s the quintessential youth-sucker, with a wardrobe that reflects the age of his last victim.
Advice: If you choose to date this guy, keep your money in the bank and get ready for a five-year relationship with no results.

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5. The Wanderer

Pro: This free spirit loves to travel the world and try new things.
Con: He avoids everyday responsibilities like health insurance and retirement plans.
Advice: If you’re a wash-and-go girl with a trust fund, then this could be a romantic adventure.

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6. The Fraternity Brother

Pro: He’s a friend to the end.
Con: He has a hard time knowing when to say “when”. Ten years after college, he still hangs at dive bars all weekend long.
Advice: If your closet is filled with team jerseys and you prefer pints over Pinot, then give him a try.

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7. The Career Bachelor

Pro: This man is successful, put-together, and knows how to lavish gifts on his ladies.
Con: Everything in his life has its place and is potentially replaceable – including you.
Advice: If you choose to date this man, make sure to stand your ground and be your own person. Otherwise, you’ll become another accessory in his spacious closet.

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8. The Poet

Pro: This artistic man will make you feel giddy with romantic letters and songs he writes especially for you.
Con: He’s all about the new-relationship high, as he searches for his next muse (and rent check).
Advice: Date this guy only while you’re in your twenties.

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9. The Trainer

Pro: This energetic guy will inspire you to get into the best shape of your life.
Con: He lives in workout clothes and hangs around the gym all day.
Advice: If you date this guy, you might want to ditch your other trainer – no sense in paying for two.

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10. The Multi-Tasker

Pro: This busy guy plays many roles in his life, but most importantly, he’s loyal to those who matter most to him.
Con: He’s too busy for a traditional relationship.
Advice: Find a way to make him a priority in your life and he’ll do the same for you.

RS, I truly hope this helps. And on a side note, beware of guys who wear too much hair product, no matter which fashion category they favor. The chemicals somehow trigger higher levels of competitiveness and selfishness.
Good luck dating this fall season, and don’t be afraid to try out some new trends.

Until next time,

Toni

Written for DFW Style Daily

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